Still


I need to die tonight
the way the swan dies
and then it lies still
because I still…

I need to agonize
and gasp for air
for one last time
so I don’t forget

the search d’armes,
the deep ravines,
the solitude,
the forced quietud,

el frenesí,
the tenderness,
the world that broke,
cet désiré avenir.

And there’s a frozen lake
over which we danced.
Et il y avait un partenaire
avec qui j’ai dansé.

A steady hand to hold
through the fouettés,
giros, turns,
pirouettes.

But life is a solo
sin él.

So there’s a frozen lake
to put away the tristesse.
Il y a un lac gelé
pour ranger the despair.

Hay un lago congelado,
lila, púrpura, azulado
qui maintient la mémoire figée
y el amor intacto,
puro, honesto,
inmaculado.

So I can die away
as the solemn cello breaks,
as the intemporel home fades,
as all collapses again,
until the end.

And as I take
one last breath:

my final relief
from pain.

«Victoria», #fotografía por Crissanta.